Adventures in Mothering 4

First, I will begin by quoting my friend Anne...."I feel so pretty". It has been an interesting day...which began rather early. I didn't know 5am came around twice in one day! Shockingly it does....but it seems that I vaguely remember now that it does...it's been a couple of years since I had a newborn.....and as much as I love my girls....I won't have another!

Getting back to 5am.... this is a time of day/night (you decide) that is to early for cleaning up ______ anyone? You win the prize! VOMIT! YES! the adventure continues!!!!!!!!!!!

Amazingly, I am still able to get the eldest child ready and find her a ride to school...for there is no way I am putting the puker in the "Up Chuck Wagon" again because it is clean and smells good again. So with child 1 gone, my full attention returns to child 2 and the laundry...for she has puked on everything in sight! It baffles me how one little sip of water and produce so much vomit!


Finally the 8am hour arrives and without a second past the hour I have already dialed the Doctors office. Voicemail! What kind of outfit is this! I try again! Voicemail! What!?! Okay, third time's a charm. Bingo! I jump at the first available appt. 10:10am! Then I tremble....the puker has to be transported there...in my beautiful much liked (I have learned not to "love" a car...bad things happen to them) Station Wagon. So, I layer the back of the car in beach towels! I wait for time to leave and Child 2 ...vomits.

We load up and poor child 2 is begging me for water. She is pitiful. I cave, against my better judgement and give her a sippy cup of water which she chugs like a Frat Boy on nickel draft night. I am about 3 miles from the house when I test my anti-lock brakes and pull off the road like I am driving a Sherman Tank. This is starting to feel strangely familiar (see Adventure 3). I get the bowl (Tupperware is great!) and Child 2 let's her rip! When that challenge is completed we set off again for the Holy Grail (Doctors office).

We are doing fine and making good time until we hit the short cut. The short cut is short in distance...apparently not time. In fact it is actually a time warp. It transports you back to the time when people drove the speed limit and farm tractors were considered transportation. As I pull up behind Jed Clampet and pretty much came to a screeching halt, I wondered why people pull out in front of other vehicles that are obviously speeding AND THERE IS NO ONE BEHIND THEM!!!!!! Finally I made it to a major highway and blew the dungarees off of good ole' Jed.

The Doctors appointment was none eventful. We left with two prescriptions and I was happy.

Back on the plantation, the drugs were administered. It took a while for the med's to kick in but the main point is...they did. Life was getting better, laundry was being done, floors were being mopped. Then Child 1 comes home and........vomit! Everywhere! and so it begins...again. Calgon! Take me away!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!